25 November 2009


Today is the eve of Thanksgiving. It's our family's first Thanksgiving without her around. We always had dinner at her house. This year, it's at ours. The food won't be nearly as good. The room won't be as warm.
Just a year ago she was well, as healthy as can be. Four months ago, she was diagnosed. Four weeks ago, she died. She was here, the wind blew, and now she's gone.
Like dust.
So earlier today, the day before the four-week anniversary of her passing, I did something that many people would call just plain dumb. They can think that.
I gave myself a tattoo. It's really small and on my hip. It's the Russian word for dust. Life is fragile and momentary.
Like dust.
Love you always,


  1. I DON'T think that's dumb at all. At all. Commemoration is NOT dumb.

    I'm so sorry, Margie. *big, WARM hug*

    BAD thanksgiving.

  2. It's not stupid. It's lovely :)
    I love you hun xo

  3. It's a very nice sentiment. Very poetic.
    But why Russian? was she from there?

  4. this is a beautiful post :D

    i am sad for you today. i think the tattoo is wonderful. <3

    i've missed you! i'm trying to be back more now. i hope you are surviving thanksgiving. i'm not doing a very good job of it (i am having a thousand troubles with cupcakes. cupcakes?! that's right. why am i eating cupcakes on thanksgiving? I DON'T KNOW I WISH I DID!!) i wish we could all just get together and have our own very lovely thanksgiving of carrots and mustard and cabbage and diet coke.

    anyway i wish i could make you happy today. i hope that it is at least a beautiful melancholy sadness. and that you are remembering vividly all the thanksgivings that have gone before.

    ok i love you. i hope you are all right. i have to go yell at my cat for stealing my cupcakes and dragging them across the floor. THEY ARE NOT YOURS, CAT, DAMN IT! please pardon me as i lick the frosting off the kitchen floor. :D