If you're out there and if you're listening, I'd really like for you to do the following for me, if it isn't too much trouble.
1) Please stop making my little sister so darn sweet, and keep her from buying me giant Reese's cups.
2) Please, somehow or another, make Mexican food fall off the face of the planet. (Or you could always just give me at least an ounce or two of self control.)
3) Make me stop eating so darn much so I'd stop having to ram my fingers down my throat and taking so many laxies.
4) Please keep me from buying food, so I might actually have some money every once in a while.
5) Please, if you can't do any of those, just make me thin.
Hope that isn't too much trouble.