04 January 2010

Le Fardeau.

I hate it when Eric gets into my business about eating. We were eating lunch together today, and I was doing really well. I was perfectly content with my veggie burger patty and my pretty little salad. That is, until a girl sat down near us with a veggie burger and curly fries, my arch nemesis. That's when the shit hit the fan, and it only took one sentence: God, those fries look good. Then Eric looked up at me and said, "Then get some." I insisted that I was okay, I was too lazy to get up, and finally, I accidentally said that my fat ass doesn't need them. Eric gave me one of those oh-god-dont-be-getting-into-this-shit-again-now-youve-given-me-right-to-be-suspicious looks. That's when he got up and got them for me, put them down in front of me and waited for me to eat. And naturally, as soon as I started I couldn't stop.
In a way, I feel like a terrible person for being angry, because I know that I really do worry him with my eating, and with his dad being so sick now, I don't want him to have to have another thing to worry about. I feel like I'm such a burden sometimes, to my family and my friends. I hate doing this to them, and I wish I didn't worry them and hurt them with this, but I can't stop. I won't stop.

1 comment:

  1. AAAaahhh thats so frustrating, your pretty proud of yourself for actually eating something then someone shoves terribly bad good under your nose and how can you refuse when they're just trying to help?.. You want to scream F*** Off, Just let me be thin, but cant because they're so darn nice...
    99 lbs? congrats, haha your my thinspo for today x