a's been all over me about my new diet. even though i told him that it was a cleanse, and that i'd still be taking in "1000" calories a day, he's freaking out, and has told my friend to keep an eye on me at meal times. i know it's because he cares, and because he hates seeing me starve myself. i'm so frustrated.

im doing okay with russian gymnast diet, i think i'll add rice cakes as a little extra.

i ate like six yesterday plus a fruit cup.

it all cam down to about 386, which isnt bad.

hopefully ill be able to shrink my stomach a bit with this, i miss being able to eat half of what i normally eat with out being hungry.

little russian gymanst

i heard about the russian gymnast diet for the first time last night

and im definitely going to try it for next week, to see if i cant lose some weight

hopefully i'll lose around five or six

maybe even more.

it goes like this:

b- 1 glass of either apple or orange juice (90 cal)

l- fruit salad:apple, pineapple, orange and water (100 cal)

d- water and green apple (36 cal)

total: 226

it say no fizzy drinks, but im a caffiene junky, and i literally cannot go a day with out it, and the school's coffee here tastes like a combination of cigarette ash, dirt, and ass.

so i'll be having my diet coke at least once a day, thank you.

so that's what it all comes down to, and it shouldn't be too hard.

wish me luck,

margie.

just stop eating

its that simple

a and i got in a fight for the first time today

i kept telling him to make more of an effort to be on time

he was an hour late to our date

so i refused to eat

we both got angry

i said just be on time

its that simple

i felt like a hypocrite

ive been gorging

margaret, just stop eating

its that simple

so far im sucking at this new diet. i binged last night because i was stressed and i couldnt purge.

fuck.

today

b: 1 protein bar- 170

l: 1/4 play of stir fry- 185

d: 2 rice cakes- 70

total: 425

i'm only into my second week of school, and im already about to die from the stress.

i have an obscene amount of work already due, on top of college applications and putting together a good protfolio. i wrote my essay for my top choice today, so at least ive got the big bad scary one out of the way. now, onto documentation. always fun.

stay thin.

margie.

diet plan and stats

500

400

300

200

100

100

200

300

400

500

anyone want to try it with me?

w: 109lbs

bmi: 19.9

note to self

never try to barf ramen

ever.

again.

lets get started

just took my last round of antibiotics

lets get this bitch rolling

fuck it all

seriously

im 110 on my own scale

and my antibiotics are making me huge because they make me feel like total shit unless i eat every hour but im about to get off them

and this time i promise you

i will finally lose the weight dont let me fail

please

dont let me fail

H

so, im tempted to go on some national campaign to get all doctors new scales, because they are always wrong, and they make me really mad whenever i get on them.

saturday's doctor's care wight: 108

monday's regular doctor's weight: 106

What do i do both times i get home from te doctor? Go straight to my scale, and everytime its says 103. Honestly.

But why so many doctor's visits, Margie?

well. It's the old mrsa, again. apparently if you get it once, you're more likely to get it again. and i have it again, worse, this time. I'm going into surgery in three hours to have the damn thing cut out of my arm. im really nervous, but im trying to keep calm and just let myself go back to sleep, but i cant. anyways. wish me luck.

margie