The Deal

I have made two deals in the past week.

One with A, and one with myself.(even though that one is more of a promise)

1. Margie gets herself healthy (eat right, get in shape), A gets himself healthy. (quit smoking, eat right, get in better shape.)

2. Margie drops ten pounds, tones stomach and ass, Margie buys new bathing suit, and fancy new lingerie to show off to A.

I love how much they contradict each other.

I'm so incredibly furious

with myself.

I told A. I told him everything. I didn't mean to.

I was complaining about how huge I'm getting.

He just looked at me, and said, "You've got an eating disorder don't you?"

I looked at him and saw the concern and the love in his eyes, and I just started bawling. I couldn't help it. I told him everything.

Suggestions

one of my favorite cousins just had her first baby, and she wants me to do a painting for the baby's nursery. as usual, I'm drawing a blank on what to paint her.

Any suggestions?

oh i have gotten FAT

oh deary me

where have I gone off to?

I have been gorging my self with endless fried thing, sugary things, salty things fat things

and it's time to come back and to get into that bikini

yes ma'am it is

margie, you touch that cookbook one more time, and i'll cut your chubby little hands off

I've been all over the place lately. I just got home from New York City, where I looked at schools and wolfed down as much food as humanly possible. I have my heart very much set on The School of Visual Arts.

ah, to live in the city, nobody knows you, nobody knows you.