due to my constant monitoring, i haven't been able to restrict.
i got so mad at a the other night because i can feel everyone watching me eat.
on top of that, i've been having horrible digestive problems for the past few months. i talked to a about it, and he said sweetly, "it's probably from starving yourself for such a long time, baby"
i don't want to agree with him, but i know he's right. i hate it when they're right.
i just can't seem to get to that happy place, where i'm restricting and small and beautiful, or when im enormous and fat and eating all the time, but i don't mind it.
i'm still stuck in the middle. the ugly, fat, sticky middle.